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Wednesday, 23 January 2013

Pewalosi and Noshcrea

Pewalosi
Land of ideals
Saturated in calm
Laced with genteel

Woods of peace
Savannah of silence
Lakes of warmth
Deserts of love

Caves of longing
Cliffs of quiet
Streams of wishes
Dunes of kisses

Everything dark
Banished away
Leaving Pewalosi
Peaceful each day

But just outside
From Noshcrea
The noise invades
Screams and shouts

The dark has grouped
Together in force
Pewalosi may be perfect
But Noshcrea is worse

Xxxxxx

Linked up at World building at real toads.  I set out to write a poem about my perfect land but quickly realised there'd be a shadow side needed elsewhere. This might become a work in progress.

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22 comments:

  1. Kerry O'Connor23 January 2013 at 17:30

    You created an intriguing setting for a clash between opposing forces of good and evil.

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  2. Sherry Blue Sky23 January 2013 at 17:55

    This is very intriguing. Even in our minds, when we imagine perfection, we know there will be a darker side somewhere. The human conundrum.

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    1. LLM Calling24 January 2013 at 19:19

      sad but true, even if that darker side is our own worry

      Delete
  3. Susan23 January 2013 at 20:52

    . . . perfect and worse? an amazing last line. I think I'd like mine half and half, please!

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  4. ScottlB23 January 2013 at 20:58

    I think I would just like to relax in Pelwalosi for awhile, the neighbors sound just a little to rowdy. Enjoyed your poem a peaceful world we should all share.

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    1. LLM Calling24 January 2013 at 19:20

      wouldn't it be lovely, just for a little while every now and then

      Delete
  5. Unknown23 January 2013 at 21:09

    That last line is an ideal sudden stop. Perfect. What is it, really?

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    1. LLM Calling24 January 2013 at 19:21

      I don't know, it's complete fiction with imagery of the Lord of the rings for the dark side and a heaven ideal for the good. this is all I have for now

      Delete
  6. Peggy24 January 2013 at 02:21

    Excellent Emma. Lovely imagery in the description as well as worldbuilding!

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  7. Margaret24 January 2013 at 02:31

    I was enjoying the serene perfect world... but I am sure you are right - a shadow balances it out.

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  8. Susie Clevenger24 January 2013 at 06:43

    Seems we cannot even create a perfect world in our minds when we are so imperfect ourselves. Such an intriguing write...I think it should become a much longer piece. Looking forward to reading it!

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    1. LLM Calling24 January 2013 at 19:23

      I'm not sure I'm brave enough Susie, but I'll leave it around to see if it wants to be developed

      Delete
  9. Helen24 January 2013 at 14:57

    I am intrigued with the names of your otherworldly places ... very sci-fi.

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    1. LLM Calling24 January 2013 at 19:23

      they're anagrams basically, can you figure out what - it's all in the poem

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  10. Kay L. Davies24 January 2013 at 18:29

    Sad but true that perfection requires a dark side, just as day requires night.
    Excellent, Emma.
    K

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    1. LLM Calling24 January 2013 at 19:24

      does it require? or is it about human failings? debate :)

      Delete
  11. jasmine calyx26 January 2013 at 02:26

    I like this: "The dark has grouped
    Together in force"

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  12. Dave King26 January 2013 at 11:20

    Great poem. Dark and light. It would do for me!

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