Ponderings and wonderings

Ponderings and wonderings

It's August; it crept up on me without enough warning! 

This is the month our daughter turns four.  Therefore it will include parties and fun along with my celebration of 4 amazing years as a mum knowing the love and wonder of a child.  

It's also my "month off from preaching" as promised by Neil.  Can you guess how much time I have for relaxing?  

But to start, ponderings on today ....  It was fantastic to be in the congregation this morning and absorb someone elses sermon, that has barely happened in 6 months. Having now experienced writing and delivering sermons I got so much from watching and listening.  The theme was the bread of life and it's given me a lot to take away.  I also found I was much more prayerful and connected during the rest of the sermon.  When I'm delivering then I'm filled with anticipation and nerves before it and still buzzing with adrenalin afterwards.  Today I could just listen, absorb, sing, pray and worship; a filling experience.  So today I've confirmed that I need to have time for me to be filled!

The other positive that came out was that when I'm just one of the congregation I can use my pastoral gifts.  A lady i know caught my eye after the service, I spoke to her and we spent time together talking about her grief. I don't know how much I helped but this is how I know I'm called to minister and that seems to be more possible when I'm not 'upfront'. 

So, this month off!  I have 4 weeks off from preaching and that is wonderful.  After that I've been convinced to make my first move into a different service and will preach on Sunday 30th. 

I obviously needed the month off from preaching because my diary is already filled with meetings and events.  I have a couple of LLM events; intercessions for a few weeks; the prayer walk preparation and also Children's and young peoples developments. 

But I am learning.  All this activity could get too much, but I believe I'm meant to take this time to think about my calling and it's aims, focus and direction.  I am reading books on book lists and Finding more prayer time.        

So here I am using this time I've been given to look at different areas I'm drawn to.  An idea for the annual carols round the crib nativity came to me "just like that" so I've knocked together a draft script to see if the young people and leaders like it.  At the same time I was able to enjoy and fully engage in a bible holiday club I took Rachel to.  It hit me so strongly that this is something we could provide and now I gave time praying for guidance on providing our own.

The last thing I have time fir is the review and renewal of my calling, perfectly timed as Neil has asked me to meet with him on Tuesday to tell it all to him.  It's all coming together!  but why am I surprised? When I hand it over and let God use me then it all makes sense.  Amen.