Wednesday 23 January 2013

Pewalosi and Noshcrea

Pewalosi
Land of ideals
Saturated in calm
Laced with genteel

Woods of peace
Savannah of silence
Lakes of warmth
Deserts of love

Caves of longing
Cliffs of quiet
Streams of wishes
Dunes of kisses

Everything dark
Banished away
Leaving Pewalosi
Peaceful each day

But just outside
From Noshcrea
The noise invades
Screams and shouts

The dark has grouped
Together in force
Pewalosi may be perfect
But Noshcrea is worse

Xxxxxx

Linked up at World building at real toads.  I set out to write a poem about my perfect land but quickly realised there'd be a shadow side needed elsewhere. This might become a work in progress.

22 comments:

Kerry O'Connor said...

You created an intriguing setting for a clash between opposing forces of good and evil.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

This is very intriguing. Even in our minds, when we imagine perfection, we know there will be a darker side somewhere. The human conundrum.

Susan said...

. . . perfect and worse? an amazing last line. I think I'd like mine half and half, please!

ScottlB said...

I think I would just like to relax in Pelwalosi for awhile, the neighbors sound just a little to rowdy. Enjoyed your poem a peaceful world we should all share.

Unknown said...

That last line is an ideal sudden stop. Perfect. What is it, really?

Peggy said...

Excellent Emma. Lovely imagery in the description as well as worldbuilding!

Margaret said...

I was enjoying the serene perfect world... but I am sure you are right - a shadow balances it out.

Susie Clevenger said...

Seems we cannot even create a perfect world in our minds when we are so imperfect ourselves. Such an intriguing write...I think it should become a much longer piece. Looking forward to reading it!

Helen said...

I am intrigued with the names of your otherworldly places ... very sci-fi.

Kay L. Davies said...

Sad but true that perfection requires a dark side, just as day requires night.
Excellent, Emma.
K

LLM Calling said...

now I read it back I see what you mean

LLM Calling said...

sad but true, even if that darker side is our own worry

LLM Calling said...

I think I'll go 80:20 :)

LLM Calling said...

wouldn't it be lovely, just for a little while every now and then

LLM Calling said...

I don't know, it's complete fiction with imagery of the Lord of the rings for the dark side and a heaven ideal for the good. this is all I have for now

LLM Calling said...

thanks Peggy

LLM Calling said...

surely does, to some extent at least

LLM Calling said...

I'm not sure I'm brave enough Susie, but I'll leave it around to see if it wants to be developed

LLM Calling said...

they're anagrams basically, can you figure out what - it's all in the poem

LLM Calling said...

does it require? or is it about human failings? debate :)

jasmine calyx said...

I like this: "The dark has grouped
Together in force"

Dave King said...

Great poem. Dark and light. It would do for me!